A vital component in any relationship, especially a romantic one, is communication. I regularly preach this to my clients. It is important to have strong lines of communication open and functional if you want a relationship to have any chance of being successful. Communication isn’t just about doing the talking, it’s also important to be an open-minded listener. The first step in improving and developing a strong relationship is taking the initiative and discussing important topics. Here are relationship topics people don’t discuss until it’s too late.
Finances
It’s important to be on the same page when it comes to finances especially when you are in a committed relationship. Discuss what money is coming in, going out and the investment decisions being made. Most couples argue about money at some point in their relationship, but the key is regularly checking in with each other. Come up with a budget that allows both parties to be equally involved and allows each individual to have an opportunity to voice their feedback. Financial disagreements end marriages and relationships daily.
Trust
As weird as it may sound, a lot of couples do not discuss their issues with trust until it’s too late. Sometimes we enter into new relationships already not trusting. Instead of waiting until the trust is broken, couples should make it a priority to talk about the trust within their relationship. Communicating this topic early on will help to eliminate any insecurities, from either individual, that are being seen as trust issues but are individual issues instead.
Feelings
Be honest about your feelings all of the time. It’s important to not bury what you feel because it will come back and bite you. Be upfront and let your partner know how you’re feeling, despite any fears you may have. If feelings are not discussed in the present, then aggression and anxiety will build up and cause a much worse outcome that may be the ending of the relationship. Focus on being honest instead of worrying about the other’s reaction, and be more consumed with how to improve the situation at hand. If your relationship is meaningful to both of you, feelings should be accepted and talked about not disregarded.
Past Relationships
This is especially important when beginning a new relationship. Lay everything out in the open. Ask and answer questions that you both feel are important and worthwhile. Disclosing prior relationships will keep trust issues and any possible surprises in the future from being big blowups. Also knowing why each other’s past relationships failed will give you insight into what the needs of each person are in the relationship.
Goals
Being in a committed relationship couples should regularly discuss goals. Are you on the same page with the goals? Should there be any adjustments to your goals? These are very important things to discuss because one of the biggest relationship enders is, that couples grow apart because they want different things. One partner may want kids while the other didn’t. One partner wants to move while the other doesn’t want to leave. These are huge decisions that break relationships up regularly. Having goal conversations often is a way to check in and make sure you are growing together and not apart.
A real meaningful relationship can’t survive without proper communication. Communicating is both speaking and listening to your partner. These few topics can push a relationship to the brinks, so establishing earlier on good communication skills is a must for success.
